Friday night.

And it's a great opportunity to start studying for my lab practical!

I've decided to reflect a little bit on my social life- or lack thereof.

Now back in the dayyyyyy on a night like this, one of the homies would probably come swoop me up in their parents car which they sneaked out. We'd drive around with no particular destination, windows down and music full blast. When we'd feel the hunger pangs, we'd head to the nearest Mcdonald's and be dollar menu millionaires. Ah, just no care in the world back then.

Ok, fast forward to the present. On a night like tonight I'm sitting at my desk with a few books strewn about, some flash cards, and about 5 different shades of high lighters. Nso music on, I need complete silence. No singing, just the sound of my own voice reciting flash cards over and over. Worried? Yes, extremely.

Do I mind? No, not really. I don't have too many friends to begin with. Well, friends that I'd feel comfortable hanging around with. Actually, I don't feel comfortable hanging out with most people my age at all. Most people my age are working part time jobs, partying, and juggling school. I, on the other hand, juggle motherhood, my relationship, and school. That's all I have in common with the youngins- school. Sure I could drone on and on about my son (because I can), but I don't know who would actually want to sit through that.

So maybe I'm doing everybody a favor by not hanging out with them. I'm saving them from an evening of potty stories and my different toddler disciplinary methods. Or maybe I'm just making an excuse for not putting in the effor to actually establish a social life.

Hmmmm. That's deep. Well, back to the books!

I really wish I had a camera..

Last night, during a long anatomy lab on muscles, I was little put off. We have our second lab practical next week and will be tested on upper musculature. I was running back and forth from our cat and the cadaver. Why dissect the cat if the muscles look SO different?? With a lecture exam on Wednesday and then the lab prac the following week, I was definitely stressing.

After being one of the last few students who stayed behind to flip the cadaver over and study back muscles, I was beginning to wonder if my goals were realistic. Can I do this? Is this for me? I'm not even close to the nursing program and I'm already second guessing myself- not a good sign.

Bag over my shoulder and lab coat still dawned, I sighed and left lab for the night. It was about 8pm and it was still warm out. There was dark gray light cast throughout campus. I was expecting a frigid cold that would hurt down to the bones, but was enveloped by a subtle warmth instead. It felt absolutely wonderful!

As I was walking to my car I was stunned by the beauty that made up the skies that night. It was a mixture of beautiful pinks, purples, and grays all intertwined between thin sparse clouds. There was also a hint of orange from the remaining sun, giving the whole scene a bit of a glow.

For the first time ever, I did not mind one bit that I park so far from campus.

I was overcome with a feeling of reassurance. I was embraced by the warmth, and enlightened by the skies. God was telling to me hold on and that everything will be okay.

It put all my problems, school and family, and even my goals into perspective. I was given strength and a much needed refreshing on my outlook towards life. It's hard to explain, but I savored that feeling and will never forget it.

I know I question my faith sometimes, but it was so hard not to believe God that night. Who else could make such different textures and colors on such different spectrums...mesh so well? And I realized that I am capable. I just need to open my heart more to my faith and Him. He is after all, the reason behind my direction in life.

Who knew it would take a stressful lab and walk to my beat up truck to establish my faith again? He really does work in mysterious ways. <3

Happy Easter!

These are for you! Achilles and I colored eggs this morning! It was SO fun. I haven't played with egg dye for years! I've since substituted them with plastic eggs filled with candy. We still had the plastic eggs this year, but I figured since Achilles is a lot older than past Easters, it would be a fun activity, and it was!

Sure he didn't seem to understand how delicate the eggs were, but a few cracks just added some character to his eggs. lol

After coloring eggs and having a snack, we watched some toons while his dad did some cement work on the side. After the toons, we took a nap before egg hunting at the park. Good thing we did, we needed all the energy we could get. It was SO tiring! I'm SO pooped.

Achilles loved his basket and all his goodies. He had a blast playing with his new golf set even though he cheats and places the balls in the holes while we're not looking. He also LOVED his new kite! He was sooo amazed. lol

This was the first egg hunt Achilles actually understood. Last year he only 'found' (the eggs were across the lawn in plain sight. lol) a few eggs and got tired of it.

Here he is ready to look for eggs, tres cute! Oh, I actually just bought him those sandals earlier while I was at Walmart buying the eggs and dye. I'm glad I did, they're so convenient!

Well, my Spring Break is officially over. I did a total of about 45 minutes worth of studying, shame on me. Ugh, back to the world of human anatomy tomorrow.

Wish me luck.

Wow.

Remember that school dramz I mentioned I was going through?

Well, it just turns out that my high school diploma is NOT accredited. Isn't that something? I got it through a private school and it cost me 400 dollars. I payed 400 dollars for a piece of useless paper.

Anyways, it served as a complication since I am signing up for the RN program at the end of this fall. I'll need not only my college transcripts, but my high school transcripts as well. Well, this 'private school' I got my 'diploma' from closed down due to 'financial reasons'. Their email account is closed and their phone number was disconnected. Where does that leave me? SHIT OUT OF LUCK, that's where!

Eh, I teared up a little about it. I have worked SO hard to maintain my current GPA (3.8 *ahem*) and it killed me that technically it was useless without my high school diploma. I made a trip to the local adult school with some questions about taking the GED test and spoke with a guidance counselor. As soon as I told her where I got my high school diploma from, she immediately told me it wasn't accredited. Apparently a lot of people have done the same and just ended up at the adult school to do their GED.

I signed up, forked over $125 (ouch) and got home to review some study guides online. I also had a book I had purchased a year ago called 'Master the GED 2008' before I was scammed into that private school. I was a little concerned because the practice tests were tough! I struggled with some of it!

Well, I took the first portion of the GED test today, math and writing, and let me tell you, they were 10x easier than any of the practice tests I took! Now I know why the book guarantees higher scores. lol

So I'm taking the second portion tomorrow. I believe it'll be reading, social science, and science. It should be a piece of cake. The only part that kills is how slow the instructor moves. I swear, everything that man does has the lease time efficiency.

We had to watch this video on how to use a calculator and fill in the bubbles on our answer sheet properly. It kind of saddened me because it was kind of...degrading?

Wish me luck tomorrow. Can't believe this is what my Spring Break is ending with. :[

I'm going coocoo mama.

Coocoo mama = what Achilles calls the game 'Cooking Mama' for his DS.

Yes, my 2-year-old son has a Nintendo DS. Yes, I know this will probably kick me in the ass later.

He only has one game, some Go, Diego, Go! game, but he stumbled across my Cooking Mama and loves to make sandwiches and pizzas. lol

Anyways, I started hormonal birth control a week ago and I am seriously going coocoo mama. I'm moody, depressed, irritable, and just constantly picking fights and bickering with my boyfriend. In fact, we are in the middle of a huge fight right now. I'm done with the birth control though. I need to go back to the fun loving, only semi-crazy, Jenn. :D

It's really killing my Spring break though, on the real. I just want to stay cooped up in my room all day. I flaked on Michelle for coffee yesterday. :[

Booboo me.

OH, and not to mention there's some other crap I'm going through regarding some school stuff. It sucks.

My luck has officially gone down the pooper.

I thought this was funny.

There was a water line break at my college yesterday that actually closed campus down for a few hours. I was supposed to check in at 415pm to see whether the campus was open again and if classes later than 445 would resume. My class started at 5, yeah, bummer. Anyways, I decided to email my anatomy professor.

pre-note: she just had surgery on her foot a few days prior.

> I’m thinking you should just go ahead and cancel lecture for today.
> I
> mean, this is a GREAT opportunity for you to rest your leg. It
> would be
> such a shame to cancel class, but I clearly have what’s best for
> you in
> mind. :D
>
> Your thoroughly upset (I mean, really really upset!) student
> because of
> a canceled class,
> Jenn

..and this is what I got in response.

Jenn, Jenn, Jenn,

Your concern for my foot is heartwarming. So much so, that I wouldn’t DREAM of canceling
class if they get that pipe fixed. Check myAVC at 4:15 for the latest info.

See ya (maybe) later.

LOL. How hilarious is that?? I love how she replied in the same note of sarcasm. She's a fun professor. Really.

Anyways, I had a really really bad bout with my vertigo today. I seriously could not get up if my life depended on it. If I tried, I collapsed right back down on the bed. I really did not want to go to lab, but I had a lecture exam to attend to. My dizzy spells managed to calm down enough for me to throw on some clothes and have Busko drop me off.

I just stayed for my test even though we had a lab right after with our cat and cadaver.

SOOO, I rarely get vertigo attacks. I think I found the cause for this sudden onset though- freaking anxiety! I don't know if I mentioned in an earlier post, but I had 3 major tests in just these past 3 weeks. I was feeling fine up to receiving the exam and looking down. Luckily I didn't blow chunks, seriously.

Please tell me why everything I had a hard time comprehending in my lecture notes was in that damn exam!?!? WHY?!?!

Anyways, as soon as I was done and outside getting some fresh air I felt a whole lot better! A few other girls (a majority of the class is made up of females. there are 2 males!) came out, I was relieved to hear that they found the exam just as difficult.

Busko came and picked me up and we just grabbed some din at subway.

OH, my lab practical...I got an 89/100 on it. LMAO. I ALWAYS GET SO DAMN CLOSE. FML. FML. FML.

It's cool. I should just rely on the overall amount of points anyways, right?

That's right, Jenn, stay optimistic. :D

I AM ON SPRING BREAK. I don't have to study tonight or for another few nights. My next exam isn't until 2 weeks! WOOOT. I already have my itenerary for next week!

- Santa Monica beach calls my name!
- I need to see that movie 'The Haunting in Conneticut'
- Busko promised me a tattoo session on my still incomplete back piece.
- Coffee with Michelle!

And somewhere there...there is SOME studying. *grumbles* The SMART thing to do would be to start studying for my next test now, right? WHATEVS.

Summer is coming up. I will die a little come that time. I was speaking with my counselor just the other day when she asked me what class I wanted to take during the summer session. I told her I was planning on taking microbiology. She kind of paused what she was doing, stared me straight into the eye, and said ever so seriously..

"That class during the summer is suicide."

OH, YEAH?? WELL, LUCKY ME!