I really wish I had a camera..

Last night, during a long anatomy lab on muscles, I was little put off. We have our second lab practical next week and will be tested on upper musculature. I was running back and forth from our cat and the cadaver. Why dissect the cat if the muscles look SO different?? With a lecture exam on Wednesday and then the lab prac the following week, I was definitely stressing.

After being one of the last few students who stayed behind to flip the cadaver over and study back muscles, I was beginning to wonder if my goals were realistic. Can I do this? Is this for me? I'm not even close to the nursing program and I'm already second guessing myself- not a good sign.

Bag over my shoulder and lab coat still dawned, I sighed and left lab for the night. It was about 8pm and it was still warm out. There was dark gray light cast throughout campus. I was expecting a frigid cold that would hurt down to the bones, but was enveloped by a subtle warmth instead. It felt absolutely wonderful!

As I was walking to my car I was stunned by the beauty that made up the skies that night. It was a mixture of beautiful pinks, purples, and grays all intertwined between thin sparse clouds. There was also a hint of orange from the remaining sun, giving the whole scene a bit of a glow.

For the first time ever, I did not mind one bit that I park so far from campus.

I was overcome with a feeling of reassurance. I was embraced by the warmth, and enlightened by the skies. God was telling to me hold on and that everything will be okay.

It put all my problems, school and family, and even my goals into perspective. I was given strength and a much needed refreshing on my outlook towards life. It's hard to explain, but I savored that feeling and will never forget it.

I know I question my faith sometimes, but it was so hard not to believe God that night. Who else could make such different textures and colors on such different spectrums...mesh so well? And I realized that I am capable. I just need to open my heart more to my faith and Him. He is after all, the reason behind my direction in life.

Who knew it would take a stressful lab and walk to my beat up truck to establish my faith again? He really does work in mysterious ways. <3